Reading Genesis today I was struck by the idea of fear. The fear of enemies, of struggles, insecurities, etc, versus the fear of God.
Reading the story of when Abraham ONCE AGAIN is stupid and decides to tell everyone Sarah is his sister and not his wife...I was amazed to see how King Abimelek feared God. What does Abimelek know of the God of Abraham? Probably not much! Yet when God comes to him in a dream he believes Him. He believes that Sarah is Abraham's wife, he believes that it is because of this that God powerfully closed the wombs of the women in his household, and he believes that God will kill them if he sleeps with Sarah. He fears God.
I'm already seeing this, that Abimelek fears God, and so I thought it was funny that when Abimelek asked Abraham why he lied he says, "I said to myself, 'There is surely no fear of God in this place.'"
It's so laughable! As if Abraham could judge character like that. How humbling it must be for Abraham to see that Abimelek very sincerely does fear the Lord. As if God was only big enough to fear in the small little world of Abraham's life.
It's like Abraham was putting God in a box. When it comes to certain things, Abraham feels confident and brave in faith...he leaves his home, he asks God to spare Sodom and Gomorrah. But in other things, he tries to take care of the problem on his own.
But I'm sure this incident taught him to take God out of the box a little bit and it definitely taught him to fear God even more, made him more faithful, as we see he obeys God to the point of nearly sacrificing his own son.
I know I can let fear command my life at times. There are moments when I am just so terrified what people might think of me...even now as I write that sentences I can think of 3 continuing circumstances where that fear rules my life. What do people think of me?
There are moments when I just don't have the courage to pray for something because my heart and soul is so weary from fearing the thing I need most to pray for.
These moments become like little corners of my existence, compartments. Relationships, hobbies, career, blogging, errands, driving, money....they become the places I think to myself, "there is surely no fear of God in this place."
But Lord, might I fear You more than all other things. Might I come to You first and not try and figure it out in my own strength. Might I realize that You are so, so much bigger than the box I put You in. You are in control, even of the things I fear the most.
You are God in those places too.
Matthew 8: 1-17